Online Telehealth · Available in California
Therapy for People-Pleasing & Self-Abandonment
When keeping the peace costs more than conflict ever would have, the pattern underneath is usually self-abandonment — learned early, rewarded often, and hard to see until life forces the question.
Keeping the peace has cost you more than conflict ever would have.
You’ve gotten good at reading the room, managing other people’s reactions, making yourself smaller so things don’t escalate. It kept things stable. It also kept you from speaking the truth. Self-abandonment doesn’t happen all at once. It happens in small decisions, across years, inside relationships and roles that rewarded your silence and punished your needs.
At some point adapting to what everyone needed became the only version of yourself you knew how to be. Life has a way of surfacing this: a career shift, a relationship ending, a move, a diagnosis, burnout. Whatever the trigger, the question underneath it is usually the same — who are you when you’re not performing?
There’s a version of you that takes up space without apology. That’s who this work is for.
For additional guidance on next steps
Optional: before intake, note what resonates on the treatment goals worksheet.